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Monday, 15 December 2025
On this day of your life
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I believe God wants you to know ... ... that holding a
grudge does no one any good, and rarely achieves
the result of hurting or damaging the one you cannot
forgive. The only one who
gets hurt or damaged by your holding a grudge is you. Now I
know that you already know this. So why hold a
grudge? Many people say,
"It is to protect my own dignity. I will not speak to
that person unless he or she speaks to me first -- and
says they are sorry, and asks forgiveness." Yet is this the way
to retain one's dignity? It may be. I'm just asking. |
Living in the Moment (OM)
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Where we Look is as Important as Who we Look For: Taking our Power Back from Dating Apps.
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Here’s my stern PSA for women regarding online dating: You can’t find love when you are in a victim consciousness.
To quote Dr. Shefali Tsabary, a clinical psychologist and author:
“When you talk about victimhood…we are victims. However, being and living in victim consciousness is where we get stuck… Victim consciousness is when you hold on to the perpetration and you now perpetrate yourself and you keep the power with the other person.
Not healing and not moving on, blaming the one who took your power away—and we don’t realize that we give them our power even more when we blame the other. We stay tethered to them. True empowerment is to take all power back, including blame.”
In today’s dating world, so many of us look to the apps.
Yes, dating apps can suck, as there is minimal ROI (return on your investment.) And while a handful get lucky, ultimately the apps reward low-quality interactions, impulsivity, short-term validation, and emotional avoidance, just to name a few.
Apps are, first and foremost, profit-seeking businesses.
Yet, we go with hope in our hearts, thinking “Maybe this time will be different.” And again leave with disappointment, frustration, and even a little disgust.
We even have data now that shows dating apps leave us dysregulated. But we keep going back. We unintentionally perpetuate our own harm.
It’s like fishing in the same pond over and over again, and being shocked that a new type of fish doesn’t randomly appear there just waiting to be caught.
Who can blame us? It’s what we’ve been told!
But when we don’t find that special fish, we then blame the pond and determine that one pond represents all fish as a whole.
We aren’t seeing our confirmation bias in action. We aren’t seeing our limited vision. We aren’t seeing our power to pick differently.
Perhaps we already have a belief: “All men are players” or “All men are emotionally stunted” or “All men are liars or narcissists,” and then we head on over to that sparkling pond where we are told we will find some good fish.
When we don’t, we say “See! I knew it! They are all worthless!” Our brain is scanning for ways to mirror back our belief to us (this is confirmation bias), and dating apps are right there waiting for us to use them as evidence. We use one place of connection without asking ourselves if this system truly even aligns with our values, and then declare all is doomed.
But where we look is just as important as who we look for.
Then we head over to Facebook groups, post comments on Instagram threads, and interact in other channels where we swim in shallow waters for camaraderie and “validation.” But these places keep our nervous systems in hyper-vigilance, fear, scarcity, and threat—again a dysregulated state, majorly amplified.
The complaining, the bonding, the righteousness, the grasp of the ego, the hits of dopamine give us a temporary feeling of relief. We sort of say to ourselves: “Ahhh, see I don’t have to change my selection pattern. Look at the all the ways I get some kind of connection when I play the victim here.” We are fed minimally, getting at least a dose of feel-good brain chemicals just by venting.
We unconsciously keep ourselves in the same pattern, and then say this is just how it is. Our narrow perspective gets rewarded.
However, it is only rewarded short-term. We find ourselves back in the same pond, catching the same fish, sharing wine and frustration stories and wondering why nothing has changed.
But validation isn’t growth. This is an old pattern that limits and prevents us from finding the deeper connection we truly want.
This is victim consciousness.
This is the self-perpetuation Dr. Shefali refers to.
When we keep looking outward to blame, we keep ourselves blind in choosing what we could do differently. We keep ourselves blind from seeing our patterns, our choices, our power. We stop zooming out and stay stuck because we have an excuse.
It’s in that moment that we can make a conscious choice to stop hurting ourselves, choose differently, and expand beyond the limited ponds we are used to fishing in. This is self-awareness in action.
Now, please don’t think I am victim blaming here.
At first, this quality of honesty and what I call “emotional mapping” I am offering here may feel jarring. Yet, it is a skill in becoming our most empowered selves.
We must look at the external systems that cage us and how we are replicating those systems internally with our mindsets and patterns.
We are in what I like to call a masculinity shift. In general, old masculine systems that tell men to repress their emotions, that emotional literacy need not matter, that women are a scoreboard of their own worth, that they should rely on sex and conquest as a coping mechanisms, or that there’s no need for rites of passage into maturity are on their way out. And that makes me hopeful.
Just like us, they too are developing self-awareness. They too are conditioned by old patriarchal systems and their unhealed nervous system patterns. They too are learning how they perpetuate their own harm. And we can meet men in whatever level of healing they are in.
I am not saying it is our fault that some men are stuck. I am not saying it is our fault that they aren’t matching our evolution. I am not simply saying “Choose better.”
But if we are still participating in apps, spaces, and threads that reward where so many wounded, unevolved men are stuck, we do have to look at what part we play.
What is our responsibility to shift our pattern? What does accountability look like here? How do our actions reinforce the old reality?
We are not responsible for men. But we are responsible for ourselves, our choices, our patterns, the environments we enter, the behaviors we accept. These are what we have power over.
Perhaps dating apps are the ponds that need to dry up. Perhaps avoiding systems that reward the old paradigm is the first line of defense in achieving our own empowerment.
Because eventually, stagnant ponds dry up.
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Gemini Full Supermoon & Final Full Moon of 2025
: Writing a New Story of Self. {December 4}
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“Whether it’s science or magic, if it’s of fun benefit, enjoy!” ~ ed
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The year 2025 has been one long-winded exhale, a deep purification, shedding, and incessantly intensified examination of all things past their prime, and servitude of the soul legacy we wish to leave behind once we take our final breath. The lungs breathing and heaving out the old, stale air in relief as the dusted air particles leave our body and being, wondering how long they’ve been lingering inside of us growing stagnant and stale.
Yet, we’ve been continuously asked to release, to shed, to let go of the old energies without the solid footing of the new structure forming just yet or the long awaited inhale of the new oxygen piercing our lungs in exchange of freshly oxygenated blood, life giving mana to the vessels of life we are. So, we’ve been asked to trust the release, trust that what we are letting go of is making way for something far more wild, soul-aligned, and heart expansive than we may even know or sense just yet.
The timelines we are activating for many of us feel fertile with unknown possibility. The brave, brazen, and bold souls we are, fearful and fear facing, we stand on the precipice of the brand new chapter, yet we can only taste and smell the faintness of resonance as we take one step and then another, the path revealing itself to us as we go. The grand vision and vantage point is still forming because we are creating this new reality, step by waking, conscious step. And we create it with our words, ideas, and thoughts as the seeds of these fertile new beginnings. The power we give to our minds to believe in fear or to believe in love. To create from fear or to create from love. The choice is ours as we exist in this seamless and dream-filled reality of “choose your own perspective” and watch reality shift and shape itself to fit what we believe and repeat on a loop in our minds and inner narratives of storytelling.
We are all storytellers. Weavers of time and space. Bringers of new tales and fables, fiction or fact, truth or illusion, grasping at the words and syllables and sounds we speak, uttering a new or old song. We speak and express daily, habitually and often times unconsciously. When we bring to consciousness our awareness of intention meeting words, of guided energy meeting matter, of what it is we truly want to communicate and express outwardly, magic and alchemy unfolds.
How amazing and profound it is that we speak and write words, share words, share ideas and conversations with others, using language as a bridge and a tool to connect and form bridges of connection to another. What a miraculous process it is to think, to speak, and to share words on a page or words with another. How our brains somehow process the sensory input and perception of it all is mind-boggling. It is only when we begin to see the decline of our mental acuity and mind state in latter years of age and extreme cases of dementia and Alzheimer’s that we feel the miraculous nature of how our minds operate in the first place and the loss of orientation and identity of self when we can no longer find the words or memories to name.
Words are energy. And hold energy. Energy deposits in and out of our words. Words carry meaning and form matter from formless air. More and more we are realizing how precious and sacred it is to exist on this planet at this time, and that what we say matters. What we think holds and bears weight on how we feel. Our thoughts, oftentimes programmed in the negative context, can control and overpower us. Shifting us into fear-based energies, negative self-talk, and inner dialogue bent on fear and catastrophe and doom.
Most of us know what it’s like to be governed by a hostile mind space. Full of conditioning, programming, and indoctrination. Did we really get to choose our thoughts, or were we just inundated from the moment we took our first breath, shaped by the language of the people, places, culture, and society we were born into? A system of oppression and repression bent on stifling our belief in self and repressing an inner narrative of love and self-acceptance, instead perpetuating self-rejection and self-ridicule. Many of us were taught early on in our formative years to mentally and habitually reject ourselves, judge ourselves, and belittle ourselves in subtle or more overt ways. Severing off from a deep, intimate, and safe space with and for ourselves, our minds became the perpetrator and our innocence the victim. So, many spiritual seekers and trauma survivors sought out practices of observation of the mind, of watching and witnessing the mind. Meditation on our daily addictive thought loops can be such a powerful practice and yet to sit down and observe the monkey mind often feels like yet another task on the never-ending to-do list. And yet, meditation can be an active process of noticing and observing the mind any time throughout the day and as best we can remembering we are the observer and witness to it all, and in that remembrance, a space is found, and in that space, a return to the present moment and our direct experience of life.
This is the Gemini and Sagittarius axis—of which we are now steeping in for this near final chapter of 2025. The sun has moved from the watery, dark, dense, karmic-filled, Scorpionic depths where we were asked to dive deeper into our fears, our hidden desires, subconscious patterning, and obsessions ruling us, to see where we were disconnected from our power and to descend deeper into self in order to ascend, like the phoenix rising. Scorpio season was intense and then some. Fears stirred loudly. Scorpio season brought us to the emotional depths, to alchemize the shadows back into light, to see the hidden aspects of self, the shamed parts of self. Scorpio season asked for us to shed and transform old ways of being, to be bold in the face of fears and choose to remember and reclaim our power.
We had a Scorpio new moon on November 19/20 opposing Uranus, now retrograde back into Taurus. A shocking change, a jolt to our emotional bodies and systems to shake us up, to free us, to liberate us from the shackles of our self-perpetuated prisons. Uranus is the awakener, here to awaken us to more life juice and zest, to shock us awake if we’ve fallen asleep at the wheel of our own lives, driving and drifting aimlessly in the dark.
This new moon illuminated the darkness we still fall prey to. The unconscious patterns of self we have been too afraid to change. Uranus says “Change is here! Be the change you wish to see.” We can sit idly waiting for life to happen to us and tower moments to rattle us, or we can step powerfully into the driver’s seat and say, “Even if my boots shake and my voice quakes, fear is only a gateway back to freedom and liberation of myself. And my liberation is worth every ounce of fear I feel as I make one small step toward breaking free from bondage.”
This new moon brought the spice and the juice and yet, we get to choose how we move through the energies and if we choose to see it as curse or opportunity to rise higher into the transformation of self. Change is truly the only way to be free. And Uranus wants us free. Scorpio says, “How deep into your fears are you willing to go in order to be free? And then, go even deeper.” Conjunct to Mercury retrograde in Scorpio, this new moon activated our minds from the emotional depths and hidden shadows. Urging us to speak our truths but from a space of contemplative reflection, not urgency, impulsivity, or knee-jerk reaction.
As we emerge from the depths of Scorpio, the sun swims now into the fiery sign of Sagittarius, with the sun’s entry on November 21. A palpable shift from water to fire, our system’s plumbing now cleaned out gets a boost of morale energy to move us forward again. Sagittarius energy is a welcomed shift for many of us, bringing in the fire, the inspiration, the invigoration and passion to fuel our dreams and visions moving forward. Sagittarius says, “Get out and live like it’s your last day on earth! Your freedom depends on it.” Sagittarius is the truth teller, the adventure seeker, the higher vision dreamer. We all have been shown a vision, a glimpse of the new adventure calling, the new experiences we wish to have, and Sagittarius says, “Go out into the world and live it now!”
And yet, we have had so many planets in retrograde motion through the month of November: Mercury, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Chiron. With so much backward, inside out, inward and internal spinning energy, we had to go within in order to see anything we’ve skipped and skimmed over along the journey of self-becoming. To reflect, revisit, and review old parts of the story, old emotions, old energies, old mind loops, old structures, old wounds. It’s not been an easy or light feeling time but fraught with heaviness and chaotic energy at times as we clear out the old debris. Not to mention getting blasted with solar storms and solar flares up the wazoo to clear our energetic, emotional, and physical pipes right out. Solar storms emit such a strong light frequency that can rattle our system in attempts to shake us like snow globes and let any loose and ill or misaligned parts of self to be purified. Bodily symptoms from the flares can have us challenged with insomnia spells, nervous system hyper-overdrive, exhaustion laced with a wiredness, and other uncomfortable physical or emotional symptoms.
As we near the end of 2025 now, the year of the ever-shedding snake, we approach our final full supermoon on December 4 at 6:14 p.m. EST, landing in the mutable air sign of Gemini at 13 degrees. The last of the three supermoons to end this year with a cosmic bang. Supermoons amplify the full moon energy even more and activate us on deeper, intensified levels. Gemini energy is fast-witted, quick to speak, curious as a cat, playful as a child, here to dance in the duality of life. Gemini is our communication and the language we speak, the words we write and transcribe in written or spoken expression. Gemini energy is intellectual and inquisitive. Governing the arms and hands, as well as the lungs, Gemini connects our embodied expression to how we give and receive touch and the intimate exchange of life breathing us, keeping us alive day after day. Gemini connects us deeper to the nervous system and how our thoughts mirror our nervous systems adaptations and default settings until we begin to fine-tune and self-regulate patterns of fight/flee/freeze/fawn. Ruled by the planet Mercury, Gemini energy brings the mental energy up a notch, or five.
And we have been moving through the final Mercury retrograde of 2025, in the signs of Sagittarius and Scorpio. A time of inner examination of our beliefs, our truths, and our subconscious programming. This retrograde has been deep, intense, and full of freedom-seeking energy, the call to keep living despite the slow down and challenges of communication, travel, and technology. Mercury stations direct on November 29, but remains in its two-week shadow period for this full moon illumination. As Mercury is the ruler of this full moon, there is a slower than normal energy here out of the norm for Gemini, as Mercury slowly begins to move forward again. Perhaps welcomed to not bounce too far off into frazzled, frenetic, manic extreme city that an unbalanced Gemini can spin off into.
Gemini energy is full of all the ideas, stories, worries, and what-ifs. In excess, this can overwhelm and debilitate us from taking any action or having clarity on our next steps. This is the shadow of Gemini energy. A mind that rules and governs us, pushing us to and fro, exhausting us into worry and anxiety. How to work consciously with the Gemini energy? Bring some space to the mind. Bring some kindness and tenderness to the mind, to say, “There, there, sweet precious, thinking thing, thank you for working so hard to keep me safe! You have such a big job that never lets you take a day off. Thank you for having so many ideas on how best to protect me, keep me safe, and prepared for life. Can we work together now to find the balance between thinking and living?”
With the sun in Sagittarius, we are reminded that life is meant to be lived, not just thought about. Of course, we need both. The manifestation of an idea. And the inspiration to take action on a given idea. Too much thinking and we stall into inaction. Too much action and we spin into disarray. Gemini energy in its excess can dissociate us from our lived and direct experience of reality, spinning off into stories of the mind, disembodying us from our bodies, and disconnecting us from the present moment. So we must stay grounded with these highly mercurial energies and come back to the present reality and experience as often as we need to.
This full moon will be an activation of the mind, to illuminate the stories and narratives we are telling ourselves. Are they truly serving us or limiting us? Are we ready to write and tell ourselves a new story and inner narrative? Even if it feels foreign and uncomfortable, can we make one small micro-shift in perspective when we lose sight of what’s true, what gives us life and light? Gemini archetypal energy is the twins, representative of the inherent duality at play in this earth plane. There are always two sides to the same coin. Gemini energy invites us to play in the duality of life. To know that life (including us) is inherently dual in nature. Dark and light. Up and down. Loss and gain. Joy and grief. Love and fear. Contraction and expansion. Withdrawn and connected. None of it is right or wrong. All interwoven in the story of life as a whole, not a fragmented fractal of energy.
A mutable grand cross of the moon and sun square with the nodes of the moon will be amplifying the energy of release here. The nodal points of Virgo as the south ruler and Pisces still as the north ruler of fate are here for karmic release points and closure. To release the old and outdated ways of being in our day-to-day reality so we can step into the new spiritual dream and soul path. Coupled with this Gemini energy, it is a time of choice making. To direct the mind into focus of what it is we want to create now. We are approaching this crossroads, and on a deep soul level we know where it is we must go next even if our minds are spinning in a tizzy still questioning the viability and reliability of it. Mutable energy brings change and the nodes of fate call us forward into the new, but we must release what was first before we have space to welcome the new. Even if anxiety stirs us, we are trusting a little bit more the soul-led decisions. With the support of this ongoing grand water trine, we can feel the deeper sense of trust beneath our feet now, holding us steadier in the new timeline and choice energy. To know on a felt level that what path we are choosing now is more soul-aligned than we will even know until we get there.
This full moon will be opposing Venus in Sagittarius. Venus in Sagittarius says after the transformation of our fears around money and intimacy (while Venus previously moved through Scorpio), we become freer now to be our authentic selves, to live our lives in a more adventurous and freedom-seeking way. Venus in Sagittarius says, “Choose the adventure of love that lights and delights you! Book that trip. Plan that romantic vacation. Choose the off beaten path to explore.” Opposing this full moon in Gemini, our minds could be thwarted with some worry and anxiety over how it all will go. The mind seeks to know what shall come to pass, but this energy is not guaranteed. Truly, life is no guarantee, so despite our fears, we must live boldly. What do we most value now? To free our own minds by choosing the adventure that scares and ignites us? Or to keep looping in story and worry, never taking inspired action? The choice is ours. Freedom and our desire for freedom is amplified here, and we may notice areas in our mind and lives where we don’t feel as free as we would like to.
The sun will be conjunct to Venus, bolstering our sense of optimism toward our love lives, toward the next adventure of self-exploration, and choosing to align our values now with inspired action and higher visions. Venus opposes Uranus, asking us to liberate ourselves from patterns of self-imposed limitation, where we’ve stifled our own explorative and freedom-seeking nature. Getting free is the name of the game now. Mercury will be making supportive trines to Jupiter, now retrograde in Cancer since November 11, as well as Saturn, stationing direct in Pisces on November 27, and trine to Neptune, stationing direct in Pisces on December 10. With all the support from the outer planets, the mind is bolstered here with spiritual and structural support, as well as emotional support. Jupiter retrograde in Cancer until March 10, 2026 pulls us back into the past, the familial stories and energies swirling, in order for us to clear the emotional cobwebs so we can move forward into 2026 and expand into new growth. Jupiter in Cancer amplifies our emotions, vulnerabilities, and sensitivities. Tread lightly on the heart of others and of yourself. Bring compassion to all tender and wounded parts of self still softening back into love and trust.
This full moon in Gemini is a doorway. Opening the doors of perception back to possibility. Of what we can create. New ideas gestating below the surface come up to the surface now to breathe. This final full moon energy activates our minds into new territory, as we shed the old stories and narratives. It’s a time to get playful and curious about what new storylines we want to co-author with the universal intelligence and support. To dance with the duality of life and not drown in one extreme or the other. To merge the mind with matter. To bridge thought into speech, the written word, and in exchange with another from a higher space and place of consciousness.
Let this full moon stir your mind with excitement, instead of endless worry over what may or may not come to pass. Let this full moon bring the inner child in you back to life. After all you’ve been through and shed, let the innocence in your heart bring your mind more peace and joy, even as things continue to change and evolve this coming year. We are the storytellers. What story do we want to tell our children’s children? What stories do we want to share about these times when all hope seemed lost and futile? This full moon says to grab the pen and start writing a new chapter bent on hope, love, possibility, and paradigm-shifting framework.
Allow this full moon to channel its work through you. You, the muse of your own life. You, the channel of the universal intelligence speaking through you, as you. Let. The. Mind. Soften. Back. Into. Trust. Of. This. Divine. Channel. Within. You. You. The. Vessel. Of. Consciousness. In. Thought. And. Action. Take. Inspired. Action. Draw. The. Bow. And. Arrow. Of. Your. Dreams. And. Watch. The. Magic. Play. Out. As. You. Take. Inspired. Action. Forward. Use. The. Mind. To. Launch. You. Into. The. New. Storyline. Sacred. Weaver. Sacred. Dreamer. You. The. Bringer. Of. Magic. In. All. You. Say. And. Do. Speak. Spells. Cast. Spells. Of. Freedom. At. The. Altar. Of. Your. Own. Tongue. Wild. Free. Uninhibited. Free. To. Be. Fully. You. And. Live. Life. On. Your. Terms. Free. Free. Becoming. Free. Again. Aho. Amen. And so it is.
Check out Anna’s podcast on the Gemini full moon on Spotify or Apple.
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