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Time heals nothing.
Time changes us. Time changes our mentality—and in some cases, it masks our wounds entirely. Time does nothing for us, except giving us days to grow older and analyze our lives longer.
Wisdom heals. Growth heals. Knowledge heals. Time, on the other hand, does not. Time makes us question our every ounce of matter. It makes us rethink who we thought we were. It gives us extra days to feel the pain we couldn’t before, because of the despair we were so clouded in.
Grief does not get easier. Trauma does not heal on its own. Abandonment never leaves our hearts. We grow older, and we feel more. Or, we grow older—and if we have the right help, we heal.
For the ones who have not found help, we hold on, and we hurt. The pain becomes unbearable—and sometimes, it just makes us numb. Pain never leaves us. It will always be there. It is just a matter of how we choose to deal with it. Some people use art to express this, some write, some lose themselves in their favorite books, some become angry, and some just feel…way too much.
Life is hard. Love is hard. Families are hard. Distance is hard. But time…time is the one constant we have in our life and the one thing that should not be hard. Time gives us just that—time. Time to find what makes us happy, to discover our passions, and to figure out if we can cope with life’s ups and downs.
All that really matters is what we do with our time. If we have issues from when we were children, what are we doing with our time to cope with them now? And how are we using our time to move forward and grow into responsible, caring, compassionate citizens of this planet?
Making the decision to get help—whether it was a forced hand or a choice of our own—is step one. Step two is to face this sh*t head-on. Time does not heal us. We heal ourselves.
We fight our demons. We decide if we are going to let another failed relationship destroy our world. We decide if we are going to let someone who did us wrong tear apart our day. The moral is that we decide. It is a simple choice.
We bring into our life what we give out. If we fight hard every day, and we give the little time we have on this earth our all, then we become what we were meant to be. We flourish into the beautiful flowers of the world, or we shrivel and crack like my dead succulent plant. (Yes, I over-watered it.) Regardless of which choice we make, it is ours. At least we have that to hold onto.
For me, I choose to grow. My journey has not been easy, and I too frequently take for granted the time I have on this planet—but starting now, I choose to get help.
I choose to be happy again, because I know the beautiful, talented, caring, humble, excellent soul that lives within me will be damned if I allow my pain to hide my shining light any longer.
It is time to heal. My time has come to let be, let go, and let in.
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Author: Stephanie Nemchik
Image: Flickr/Niamh
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