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Grief can arise from many life situations, but know it is not a permanent state of being. When we experience any kind of devastating loss, whether it is
the loss of a loved one, a dream, or a relationship, feelings may arise
within us that are overwhelming or difficult to cope with. This sense of
grief can also come up when we are separated from anyone or anything we have
welcomed into our lives. And while it may feel like we are caught up in a
never-ending spiral of sadness and emptiness, it is important to remember
that the grief we are feeling is not a permanent state of being. Rather, grief
is part of the process of letting go that in many ways can be a gift,
allowing us to go deeper within ourselves to rediscover the light amidst the
seeming darkness. The emotions that accompany any kind of loss can be intense and varied. A
sense of shock or denial is often the first reaction, to be replaced by
anger. Sometimes this anger can be directed at your loved one for
"abandoning" you; at other times you may feel outrage toward the
universe for what you are enduring. And while there are stages of grief that
people go through -- moving from denial to anger to bargaining to depression
to acceptance -- the cycles of grief often move in spirals, sometimes
circling forward and then back again. You may even experience moments of
strength, faith, and laughter in between. While these emotions seem to come
and go sporadically, it is important to feel them, accept them, and allow
them to flow. With time, patience, and compassion, you will eventually find
your center again.
As we move through our grief, we may find ourselves reluctant to release our
pain, fearing we are letting go of who or what we have lost. We may even
regard our movement toward healing as an act of disloyalty or giving
up. Know that while the hurt may fade, the essence of what you had and
who you loved will have already transformed you and forever stay with
you. If anything, once you are ready for the pain of your loss to
subside, their memories can then live more fully within you. Remember, that
healing is a part of the spiraling cycles of grief, and that in letting
yourself feel restored again, you are surrendering to a natural movement that
is part of the dance of life.
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