Putting yourself first means that it may be
necessary to say no to someone else in order to say yes to yourself. We have all heard the instructions of an
airline attendant reminding us to put on our own oxygen mask before we help
anyone else with theirs. This advice is often cited as a metaphor for
self-care because it so accurately expresses why it is important. It seems to
say, ironically, that if you can’t take care of yourself for yourself, do it
for others. Few situations in our daily lives mimic the wake-up call of an
airplane emergency, so it’s easy to keep putting self-care off — easy, that
is, until we get sick, overwhelmed, or exhausted and suddenly don’t have the
energy to care for the people who count on us. That’s when we realize we
haven’t been getting the oxygen we need to sustain ourselves. We begin to
understand that taking care of ourselves is neither selfish nor indulgent;
it’s just plain practical. Putting yourself first means that it may be
necessary to say no to someone else in order to say yes to yourself. For many
of us, there is always something we feel we could be doing for someone else,
and it helps to remember the oxygen metaphor. You can even encourage yourself
by saying, “I am caring for myself so that I am better able to care for
others,” or some other mantra that will encourage you. It also helps to
remember that self-care doesn’t have to be composed of massively
time-consuming acts. In fact, the best prescription for taking care of
yourself is probably small, daily rituals — like taking 30 minutes for
yourself at the beginning and end of the day to meditate, journal, or just
be. You also might transform the occasional daily shower or bath into a
half-hour self-pampering session. Whatever you decide, making some small
gesture where you put yourself first every day will pay off in spades for you
and the ones you love. The oxygen you need is all around you; sometimes you
just need to be reminded to breathe. |
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