|
How are you with judgement in your life at this time?
Feeling judgemental – of another, or yourself? Feeling judged – by
another, or yourself? Feeling guilty or ashamed for being judgemental?
Feeling anger, hurt or shame for being judged? Observing someone
judging? Observing yourself judging? None of the above?...
Being judgemental isn’t the same as having an opinion.
Judgement is a harsh energy and is shaming. When you judge you are
condemning yourself/another for perceived wrongness/flaws/mistakes,
etc.
You offer
an emotionally safe space when you come
from
a non-judgemental place.
Outer judgements can be a way you project and discharge
hidden self-judgements, guilt, shame, or anything else onto another
(which may not be conscious and can be repressed and disowned). This
can be obvious with someone unknown who is a blank slate for projections.
What anyone decides about someone they don’t
know
can
reveal what their shadows are hiding from show.
The less judging anyone is of themselves, the less
they’ll be of anyone else.
Don’t judge yourself for being judgemental! Recognize, acknowledge,
feel the feelings around judgement for release, forgive
yourself/another if that helps, and let go (forgiveness can be a
process that involves feeling and healing. Allow yourself that
process).
Being non-judgemental isn’t about ignoring something, or
your feelings, or not having an opinion, preferences, principles,
boundaries, and so on.
You can witness and learn from what you are witnessing,
take responsibility for your reality, attend to what’s going on within,
and so on. If someone presses on a button, address the button that is
being pressed on, which exists irrespective of anything pressing on it
(and be why you may have attracted something pressing on it).
Present judgements can reflect unresolved past
judgements or grievances (towards self/another) rearing their head
through the present trigger. If you are secretly judging yourself, or a
parent, or someone from your past, for doing or not doing, or being or
not being [you name it], you may judge that when you encounter it in
another.
Reflecting on the possible hidden agendas and pay-offs
around judgement can also shed light. Not so long ago I shared the Carl
Jung quote: "...Condemnation does not liberate,
it oppresses."
Judgement can be used as an attempt to oppress, or to
feel ‘better than’ and/or avoid feeling ‘less than’, through the
diminishment of another via judgement. Other agendas that can
foster judgement include competition, jealousy, arrogance, control, as
examples.
You can learn from your judgements about what’s going on
inside. It’s interesting how people have differences with what they
tend to judge. Is there something that particularly bugs you that you
judge? What and why is that? Have you ever experienced those qualities
in yourself, either now or in the past, thought or acted out, towards
yourself or another?
Let go of self-judgement and choose to accept, forgive
and be loving and compassionate with yourself.
The more compassionate anyone is with themselves
the
more compassionate they'll be with anyone else.
You’re human and you’ll make mistakes, which are an
integral part of the human experience. Don't fall into the trap of
judging yourself for them.
Your inner critic is not your true self's voice.
Judgement compounds what is judged and keeps you captive
to those traits. Acceptance, love, compassion, understanding,
awareness and forgiveness, conversely, help you let go of
judgement, and whatever else, be those thoughts, feelings, experiences,
situations, and so on. You can be mindful, process your feelings, make
choices, etc.
Self and other forgiveness can also help as a way
through with letting go of judgements against others or yourself, and
returning to greater truth of love and your loveability.
One way to help yourself love yourself is to
forgive yourself.
Much love,
Aine Belton
|
No comments:
Post a Comment