Learning to Trust My Feelings
How can I trust my
emotions, thoughts, and innermost feelings when everything is so saturated with
codependency?
How do I know if it’s
live, or if it’s a seemingly endless recorded playback from something that was
over 50 years ago?
How do I trust myself
again?
How do I trust my
thoughts?
How do I know if it’s
coming from my Higher Power, or from yet another angry and disgruntled core
issue?
How do I trust that a
person is safe or unsafe when my triggers react to everyone as if they post the
same threat?
How do I overcome this?
I pray that my Higher
Power and my program of codependents will help me to be able to tell the
difference, as well as teaching me to learn to trust what I’m feeling about
people, places, and things. CoDA is helping me to learn to trust if what I’m
feeling is accurate and not some pre-recorded replay of the same past
dysfunctional decisions, which always lead to the same results. Not by choice,
but rather out of instinct and being drawn to the familiar, while
simultaneously being repelled by the unfamiliar.
I pray I can stay on
the path of right-thinking to finally be able to open up to go beyond my
comfort zone. I am learning to sit with my feelings to analyze them before I
react from being triggered by trauma from the past. I feel this usually has
gentler, softer results than when I act impulsively from my reptile brain. I’m
grateful that such a program exists and I can’t wait to meet my future
CoDA-Caramelized-Self.
Thank you for reading
my story,
Pamela W. - 9/09/20
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