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Conflict should always be met with open ears and an open heart. Conflict is an unavoidable part of our lives because our beliefs
and modes of being often contrast powerfully with those of our loved ones,
acquaintances, and associates. Yet for all the grief disagreements can cause,
we can learn much from them. The manner in which we handle ourselves when
confronted with anger or argument demonstrates our overall level of patience
and the quality of our energetic states. To resolve conflict, no matter how
exasperating the disagreement at hand, we should approach our adversary with
an open heart laden with compassion. Judgments and blame must be cast aside
and replaced with mutual respect. Conflict is frequently motivated by
unspoken needs that are masked by confrontational attitudes or aggressive
behavior. When we come at conflict with love and acceptance in our hearts, we
empower ourselves to discover a means to attaining collective
resolution. The key to finding the wisdom concealed in conflict is to ask yourself why
you clash with a particular person or situation. Your inner self or the
universe may be trying to point you to a specific life lesson, so try to keep
your ears and eyes open. Once you have explored the internal and external
roots of your disagreement, make a conscious effort to release any anger or
resentment you feel. As you do so, the energy between you and your adversary
will change perceptibly, even if they are still operating from a more limited
energy state. Consider that each of you likely has compelling reasons for
thinking and feeling as you do, and accept that you have no power to change
your adversary's mind. This can help you approach your disagreement
rationally, with a steady voice and a willingness to compromise.
If you listen thoughtfully and with an empathetic ear during conflict, you
can transform clashes into opportunities to compromise. Examine your thoughts
and feelings carefully. You may discover stubbornness within yourself that is
causing resistance or that you are unwittingly feeding yourself negative
messages about your adversary. As your part in disagreements becomes
gradually more clear, each new conflict becomes another chance to further
hone your empathy, compassion, and tolerance.
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