When I was a child I learned that love was a most powerful, healing energy that could fix almost any problem. As I grew up I took that wisdom and felt that any problem faced could and would be overcome if only I could and would love more.
When I finally gave up trying to fix others because my own fatigue and self-neglect had made my life (and the lives of those I claimed to love) unmanageable, I came to CoDA.
When Valentine's Day came around I felt sad because I had no Valentine. Even though my Co-Dependent habits pushed people out of my life; I thought I was smarter! Old urges to act the way I used to act were tempting me. My sponsor pointed this out and told me this was self-pity and said to me, "No Valentine? Lay off the Whine!"
At first I was angry and even offended at hearing this! But wanting recovery, when I asked how "Lay off the Whine" applies, my sponsor told me about being grateful for life and for recovery. When my sponsor also told me about how sharing my progress and desire for recovery was helpful to them, I felt a little silly feeling sorry for myself.
Love is indeed a most powerful, healing energy; I got it from my sponsor and not a romantic relationship I wasn't yet ready for.
- Anonymous 1/23/16
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