This week marks the holiday of Tisha B’Av, the Ninth of Av, a day known by the kabbalists to be the most negative day of the entire year.
I know. Not exactly the kind of opening that makes you want to keep reading, but stay with me.
When kabbalists describe a day as “negative,” they’re referring to the energy available at that time, in this case, the level of darkness that arises. In this way, the Ninth of Av has earned its reputation. Some of the most devastating events in history have fallen on this exact date: the destruction of the First Temple, and then, centuries later, the Second Temple. The outbreak of the First World War. The beginning of the deportations from the Warsaw Ghetto in 1942. Again and again, on this one day, darkness has found its opening.
So your next question is probably the obvious one: why on earth would we participate in a day like this?If the Ninth of Av falls on July 23rd, why not pull the covers over our heads and wait for July 24th?
That’s a good question. And luckily, it has a good answer.
Here is what the kabbalists understood, and what I find genuinely astonishing every year: when the level of darkness is high, it means an equal amount of Light is also available, we just have to exert conscious intention to awaken it. This shifts the perspective profoundly doesn’t it? We can look toward the Ninth of Av with dread, expecting negativity OR we can understand that if darkness is at a high on the Ninth of Av, that means the potential for Light—healing, blessings, miracles, and assistance—is greater than any other day.
Not in spite of the darkness but because of it. This is even reflected in the natural world.
The Aurora Borealis a spectacular dance of light that can only be seen in the darkest parts of the world. The Evening Primrose, Moonflower, and Night-Blooming Jasmine are all flowers that only bloom and release their scents after the sun has gone down. Fireflies, shooting stars, the Milky Way… all are beautiful expressions of light that require the dark.
Darkness and Light are not two separate forces doing battle; they are two qualities of energy and it’s up to us which we will connect to. The only variable, the thing that determines which one we experience, is our consciousness.
We know this, and yet must be reminded of it constantly. Especially when we are faced with heavy challenges. Every challenge we experience comes to us for a very specific reason, and that reason is our transformation. Just as the level of darkness must equal the level of Light, the breakdown must match the breakthrough. The bigger the rupture, the bigger the opening.
I understand this is a tall order. When we are in the middle of something painful, the last thing we want to hear is that it’s “for our growth.” I would never ask anyone to pretend that pain doesn’t hurt. But I will ask you this: think back to a time in your life that was incredibly challenging. A loss, a disappointment, a heartbreak, a plan that fell apart completely. Now look at who you became on the other side of it. I would bet there is a silver lining there and probably something much more than a silver lining… a more authentic, awakened version of you.
We are so quick to define our experiences and ourselves. This is good, that is bad. This is a blessing, that is a curse. But we’re so often wrong. How many times have you chased something you were certain would make you happy, only to discover that it didn’t? How many times did the door that closed turn out to be the very thing that led you to the life you were meant to live? We think we know exactly how things should unfold, we think we have all the information based on what we perceive with our five senses, and this need for knowing is one of our biggest obstacles.
It isn’t our job to catalog what is good and what is bad. Our work is to continually place our trust in the process and to have unshakeable certainty in the Creator, no matter what our circumstances look like in the moment.
My mother-in-law and great teacher, Karen Berg, elevated from this world on the 9th of Av six years ago. Days of elevation are especially powerful because they allow us to tap into the energy a person’s soul brought to the world during their lifetime, and the perfection of this is never lost on me.
Karen often talked about challenge and resistance as necessary elements for manifestation of any kind. A seed needs the resistance of the earth, as well as temperature and water fluctuations, wind, it needs both light and dark to become a healthy plant or tree. A lightbulb may get plugged into a current, but without the resistance created by its filament, it would reap nothing but a brief flash and a mess of shattered glass.
We also need resistance to reach the fullness of our potential. So this year, don’t hide from the Ninth of Av. Whatever existing challenges or negativity you’re experiencing, use them, get curious about your fear and your judgment, and ask for assistance in releasing them. Ask to see yourself, your life, and the world around you in the most positive light. Notice what shifts, even if it’s small at first.
On the day when the greatest darkness is possible, ask for the greatest Light. Bring your consciousness to it deliberately: the healing you’ve been waiting for, the blessing that feels out of reach, the situation in your life that looks like pure breakdown. This is the day it can become the breakthrough. This may be known as a day of darkness, but it can be made into a day of tremendous Light.
It all depends on how you choose to see.
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