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Our perception of humanity as a whole is, to a large extent, dualistic. We
paint people with a broad brush -- some are like us, sharing our opinions and
our attitudes, while others are different. Our commitment to values we have
chosen to embrace is often so strong that we are easily convinced that our
way is the right way. We may find ourselves frustrated by those who view the
world from an alternate vantage point and make use of unusual strategies when
coping with life's challenges. However ardently we believe that these people
would be happier and more satisfied following our lead, we should resist the
temptation to try to change them. Every human being has been blessed with a
unique nature that cannot be altered by outside forces. We are who we are at any
one point in our lives for a reason, and no one person can say for certain
what another should be like.
The reasons we try to change one another are numerous. Since we have learned
over time to flourish in the richness of lives we have built, we may come to
believe that we are qualified to speak on behalf of the greater source. The
sum total of our knowledge will never compare to what we do not know,
however, and our understanding of others' lives will forever be limited. The
potential we see in the people who are a part of our lives will never be
precisely the same as our own, so we do these individuals a disservice when
we make assumptions about their intentions, preferences, and goals. Our power
lies in our ability to accept others for all their quirks and differences and
to let go of the need to control every element of our existence. We can love
people for who they are, embracing their uniqueness, or we can love them as
human beings from afar.
Your ability to influence people may grow more sophisticated because others
sense that you respect their right to be themselves, but you will likely
spend more time gazing inward, into the one person you can change:
yourself.
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