From Fuzziness to Clarity
For
a large part of my life I felt I had a fuzzy outline. Reading through old
journals as I work through my Step 4 inventory, I realized I was constantly
looking to other people, places, or things to define me and give me value. I
was so lost. When I joined CoDA, I began building that sense of self, one
feelings-check at a time. Learning to identify feelings filled in the
fuzziness, and pretty soon I discovered boundaries. Parts of myself finally had
clear definition. How exciting that was!
All
I had to do was be and express the person inside those boundaries. To be myself
and do the next right thing is all that my higher power asks of me. In fact, it
is my responsibility to life, to be 'me', and I take that job seriously. I ask
myself 'what do I want?', 'what do I need?', 'what can I give freely?'. It's
not completely straightforward, sometimes I don't know, but at last I can admit
to not knowing and be ok.
C.
07/13/22
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