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It is dishonest to enter into a relationship
with the idea that you are going to change or fix them. |
A relationship, in the truest sense of
the word, means relating to another. Usually when we say that we relate to
someone, it is because we’ve found common ground. But part of relating is
finding ways to make ideas that seem different come together. So often when
we choose relationships, we try to fit another person into our predetermined
ideal. When they don’t fit perfectly, we may try to make them over, creating
our own vision from the raw material they’ve brought. But unless someone asks
for guidance and direction, entering into a relationship with someone we want
to change is dishonest. Then our relationship becomes with someone we’ve
imagined, and anytime our partner steps outside of that imaginary projection,
we will be disappointed. An honest relationship is one in which we accept
each other as whole individuals, and find a way to share our life experiences
together. Then, whenever we want, we can choose as a couple to give the
relationship a makeover by renewing the way we interact. |
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