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We all know someone who
has elevated the process of complaining to a high art. Sometimes funny,
sometimes exhausting, these people have the ability to find a problem
just about anywhere. In its more evolved form, complaining is simply
the ability to see what’s not working in one’s own life or in the
external world, and it can be quite useful if followed to its natural
conclusion — finding a solution and applying it. However, many of us
don’t get that far, and we find that complaining has become an end in
itself. In small doses, this is not a big problem, but if complaining
has become a huge part of our identities, it may be time to take a good
look at how we are spending our energy.
Complaining is a person’s
way of acknowledging that they are not happy with the way things are.
In a metaphorical way, when we complain or criticize, we are tearing
down an undesirable structure in order to make room for something new.
But if all we do is tear down, never bothering to summon the creative
energy required to create something new, we are not fulfilling the
process. In fact, we are at risk of becoming a stagnant and destructive
force in our own lives and in the lives of the people we love. Another
issue with complaining is that we sometimes tend to focus on other
people as a way of deflecting attention from ourselves. Transforming
complaining into something useful is a twofold process that begins with
turning our critical eye to look at things we can actually do something
about and then taking positive action.
When we find ourselves
complaining, the last thing we need to do is get down on ourselves.
Instead, we can focus on wanting to make some changes. We can ask
ourselves the positive question: What would I like to create in the
place of whatever it is I want to tear down? When we do this, we
channel a negative habit into a creative process, thus using our energy
to change the world around us in a positive way.
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