Author’s note: This version of unconditional love does not matter when it comes to an unhealthy or abusive relationship.
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Know that if I love you:
I’m not going to try and change you. I love you for who you are.
Know that if I love you:
I accept your flaws, your imperfections. Loving only the good in someone is not love.
Know that if I love you:
You can tell me anything. No judgement. No secrets. If you can’t feel comfortable sharing your darkness and your mistakes, then you are with the wrong person.
Know that if I love you:
Your dark is as important as your light. Soul love cannot love the light without the dark. I want the whole you.
Know that if I love you:
You never need to pretend to be someone else. I want the real you—the raw, messy you. Take your mask off.
Know that if I love you:
I do not own you. You are not my property to possess. You are still an individual and I will encourage you to have your own interests.
Know that if I love you:
I will not constantly call or message you. I will not assume you should spend every spare moment with me. I want you to have your time. I am independent with my own interests, as you should be.
Know that if I love you:
I will trust you. If insecurity breeds distrust, that requires inner work. If you break trust, we will communicate openly and honestly. Nothing can be fixed if we can’t speak our truth.
Know that if I love you:
We will always work together to solve problems, regardless of how large or small.
Know that if I love you:
I love without conditions. Placing conditions on your love is not true love.
Know that if I love you:
I will also love myself without condition. For if I don’t love myself, how can I love another.
Know that if I love you:
I will respect you and your choices—even if I may not always agree with them.
Know that if I love you:
I will always be open about my feelings. You will never be left wondering.
Know that if I love you:
I will always have your back. Whether you are there or not. Loyalty is the key.
Know that if I love you:
You can be completely vulnerable. I want to see your strengths and your weaknesses, your happiness and your sorrow.
Know that if I love you:
You will always know how important you are to me.
Know that if I love you:
I may be a little jealous from time to time, but I will never encroach on your privacy. Everyone is entitled to privacy; it’s called boundaries.
Know that if I love you:
We will have an amazing energy and chemistry. Emotional and physical intimacy is important to any relationship.
Know that if I love you:
We will laugh, a lot. Humour is such a gift.
Know that if I love you:
I will want you. I will not need you. Neediness is insecurity.
Know that if I love you:
I will be passionate. I will want to touch you. Hold you. Be near you.
Know that if I love you:
I see your inner ugliness as much as I see your inner beauty, and I accept you. All of you. Just as you are.
Know that if I love you:
I love you without restriction. I trust you without fear. I want you without demands.
Know that if I love you:
I understand there will be hurt and pain at times. I want reality, not a fairy-tale.
Know that if I love you:
I will make tough decisions, if required. I will not sweep difficulties under the carpet or avoid hard truths. Good relationships will never survive when there are secrets or avoidance. Lay them bare and deal with them.
Know that if I love you:
I will let you go with peace and grace if the relationship is no longer working. I will fight for you and what’s important, but I will never beg. If one or both hearts have left, it’s time to let go, respectfully and with dignity.
Know that if I love you:
There will always be forgiveness. The relationship may end and irrevocable mistakes may be made, but there will always be forgiveness. Because without forgiveness, there is negative attachment and resentment.
Know that if I love you:
It will be the sweetest of gifts. My love will always be my version—this version—of unconditional.
Know that if I love you:
A part of me will always hold love for you, even if from afar.
~
AUTHOR: MICHELLE SCHAFER
IMAGE: ELIA PELLEGRINI/UNSPLASH
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