{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}
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Mom never knew I read her romance novels as a teen.
Unfortunately, the relationships I learned about in those books didn’t prepare me for the reality of adult love. Those of us
who have tried relationships know, they take work, and they’re often not as filled with unbridled passion and hot pursuit as your typical Harlequin.
Have you ever read a romance novel or a story with relationships in it and loved the idea, but felt like something was missing? Or maybe the relationships didn’t feel healthy, realistic, sustainable, or attainable? Yeah, me too.
My debut novel, Kaleigh’s Heart, is about more than romance. It’s about so much more than gorgeous, tiny-waisted damsels in distress being rescued by tall, ruggedly handsome white knights in shining armor. It’s about more than intense drama just for
the sake of entertainment.
It’s about savoring fun, more realistic relationship stories that we can relate to and even learn from. Characters we can love, and in whom we can recognize bits of ourselves.
Plus, wisdom–and dare I hope, inspiration–woven around some of the most common relationship issues that we face in real life.
This story provides more than a simple escape.
I want the reader to fall in love with the characters without knowing for sure what they look like or envisioning them however they like, instead getting to know who they are as souls and how they go about life. Why should I, the writer, get to decide the color of a character’s hair, eyes, or skin? How small their waistline is or isn’t, how long their inseam, or how big their feet?
We have evolved. Our love stories, to date, have not kept up with the times.
Now, I understand the allure of being rescued and I enjoy my fair share of escapism, don’t get me wrong. But love is–maybe oddly–more relational than ever. Less transactional. In today’s love stories, we aren’t as likely to get married for the woman’s dowry or the man’s family name. Not to mention the many forms love relationships can take.
We are increasingly able to freely choose whom and how we love. And though the work isn’t done, this progress is a huge victory. Let’s celebrate it!
I aim to start a movement to share more love in all its forms. To give more realistic and inclusive variations of love a platform for exposure, and to embrace and move toward healthy, thriving love stories for us all—no matter how that looks.
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Kaleigh was finding spirituality again through all these ups and downs, and that was a most unexpected side effect.
She had certainly never set out to find God—or the Universal Creator, or whatever. She wasn’t even ready to name it yet, but she knew she was feeling things and rediscovering a level of faith that she hadn’t experienced since she was a kid. Since before she blamed God for taking her mom and abandoning their family with that one vengeful act.
She was still skittish around the word “God.” It made her uncomfortable and brought up many of those old feelings again. Abandonment, hatred, fear, so much sadness. A depth of ugliness that no one should ever feel, much less feel toward an entity that is supposed to be responsible for all of life, including hers.
“God” brought up distorted images of an old white man in the sky handing out judgment and punishment to good people to teach them a lesson, all while turning a blind eye to the truly terrible things happening in the world.
But suddenly, she found herself sending prayers—somewhere, to someone she knew was listening. Someone who was working with her instead of against her. Someone who wanted Xavier to live just as much as she did, who loved him maybe even more than she did.
Everyone who loved her knew how she felt about God, and here she was talking to a “higher power.” Maybe all this had made her lose her marbles.
But she’d never felt so sane, or so safe. Good heavens, that was an odd thing to admit right now, with all the uncertainty swirling around her, especially where Xavier was concerned. He had nearly just died. And yet, she was absolutely certain that things were on the right track. Things were happening exactly as they were supposed to happen.
If Xavier hadn’t ended up in that accident and then here in the hospital, she would never have been back in his life so soon, if ever. Seeing him like this had affected her in ways she never would have expected. The whole ordeal had shaken her to her absolute core, a place that hadn’t been touched since her mom’s death all those years ago.
If his vitals hadn’t crashed, Kaleigh wouldn’t have broken down, broken open. She would never have come face to face with losing him for real, and she’d have been able to sweep all this under the proverbial rug. She could even imagine herself walking away at the end of it all, knowing he was fine. Going off to find herself again, without much of a backward glance.
But his mortality was an obvious thing now. Xavier was human, and what’s more, he was her human. She hadn’t thought her heart had even pieced itself together enough to ever be affected like that again. And yet, here she was. Heart wide open, ready to love Xavier (and herself) more fully than she would have ever thought possible.
She was ready to allow herself to feel and love and hurt and rage and fall and pick herself back up, because she now knew that was possible. She was way more capable and flexible than she’d ever given herself credit for.
Her heart was elastic, not glass.
Broken hearts are made to mend. With the right attention and care, love itself will piece them back together.
Kaleigh realized now, with a knowing that rushed over her like a translucent wave, that love doesn’t hurt. Losing someone she loved could hurt, sure, but only as much as she allowed it to. Her eyes opened to the fact that she had the power to choose her reactions. All these years, she thought she had no choice. She had forced herself into a protective shell against loving and losing, and it had done nothing but close her off from those who loved her. She’d never felt comfortable being loved, because she’d been unable to fully receive it, much less return it.
Now she was aware of all the people she’d pushed away—and of course, those who’d gone right on loving her regardless. Her dad, Xavier, his entire family. She’d been so self-involved. She hadn’t truly seen their beautiful examples, hadn’t wanted to. But now, like her dad had said back at the cabin, she saw what a waste it was to live without love.
She vowed to love with her heart wide open from that moment on. There was no better way; in fact, there was no other way. Not for her. Not anymore.
And maybe it was because she’d always heard that, “God is love,” but by opening up to love again, she’d also opened herself back up to the existence of that higher power, or whatever she decided to call it. She certainly didn’t have a better reason for everything that had happened. To think maybe all this was happening exactly as it was supposed to, by design and not by default! To draw her and Xavier back together. Or at least to help her understand what love was, that it was worth everything, no matter the perceived cost, and to help her see and feel all the support she had in this life.
Whether any of that made any sense or not, she was absolutely certain there was more to all this than coincidence. She wasn’t about to try to explain the way she was feeling to anyone else, lest they think her mad or overcome by circumstances, but she couldn’t wait to share herself with Xavier in all the ways, including having this exact conversation.
Against all odds, a thrill of excitement ran down her spine. Anticipation crinkled around her newly opened heart. Oh, she couldn’t wait to love that man with everything she had!
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*If you’d like to support the independent publication of Kristen’s book, and be among the first to pre-order a copy, please check out her Kickstarter campaign.
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