{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}
~
Long before I started working at Elephant Journal, my mom recommended a book to me by Buddhist teacher and author Pema Chödrön.
That book was called The Places That Scare You.
At the time, I remember skimming through a few passages but not fully committing to sitting down and reading it all the way through. I could blame this on a number of things: being young, getting caught up with school and work, wanting to spend time with friends.
But the reality is I was pretty much scared of everything back then.
And Chödrön‘s words were a magnifying glass for my fear, pain, and insecurity.
While those feelings haven’t disappeared with the passing of time, I eventually got to a place where I was open to exploring the places and feelings that triggered me. That left me feeling uncertain. That caused me suffering.
So it felt like a full circle moment when I began working as an editor at Elephant and our Editor-in-Chief, Waylon Lewis, recommended a list of mindful authors and books. And who was at the top of that list?
Pema.
Over the years, I’ve found so much peace in her words and teachings. But what still surprises me is that this peace doesn’t come from Chödrön glossing over the tough stuff or relying on blind positivity to get through the struggles in life. Instead, it is her brutal honesty and down-to-earth advice that resonates most with me.
To celebrate Chödrön’s upcoming 88th birthday on July 14th, here are four quotes for anyone who’s ready to face their fears head-on:
“That nothing is static or fixed, that all is fleeting and impermanent, is the first mark of existence. It is the ordinary state of affairs. Everything is in process. Everything—every tree, every blade of grass, all the animals, insects, human beings, buildings, the animate and the inanimate—is always changing, moment to moment. We don’t have to be mystics or physicists to know this. Yet at the level of personal experience, we resist this basic fact. It means that life isn’t always going to go our way. It means there’s loss as well as gain.” (from The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times)
“Things are always in transition, if we could only realize it. Nothing ever sums itself up in the way that we like to dream about. The off-center, in-between state is an ideal situation, a situation in which we don’t get caught and we can open our hearts and minds beyond limit. It’s a very tender, nonaggressive, open-ended state of affairs. To stay with that shakiness—to stay with a broken heart, with a rumbling stomach, with the feeling of hopelessness and wanting to get revenge—that is the path of true awakening. Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic—this is the spiritual path.” (from When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times)
“It’s not impermanence per se, or even knowing we’re going to die, that is the cause of our suffering, the Buddha taught. Rather, it’s our resistance to the fundamental uncertainty of our situation. Our discomfort arises from all of our efforts to put ground under our feet, to realize our dream of constant okayness. When we resist change, it’s called suffering. But when we can completely let go and not struggle against it, when we can embrace the groundlessness of our situation and relax into its dynamic quality, that’s called enlightenment, or awakening to our true nature, to our fundamental goodness. Another word for that is freedom—freedom from struggling against the fundamental ambiguity of being human.” (from Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change)
“Not wandering in the world of desire is another way of describing cool loneliness. Wandering in the world of desire involves looking for alternatives, seeking something to comfort us—food, drink, people. The word desire encompasses that addiction quality, the way we grab for something because we want to find a way to make things okay. That quality comes from never having grown up. We still want to go home and be able to open the refrigerator and find it full of our favorite goodies; when the going gets tough, we want to yell ‘Mom!’ But what we’re doing as we progress along the path is leaving home and becoming homeless. Not wandering in the world of desire is about relating directly with how things are. Loneliness is not a problem. Loneliness is nothing to be solved. The same is true for any other experience we might have.” (from When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times)
~
AUTHOR: NICOLE CAMERON
IMAGE: CAIQUE NASCIMENTO/PEXELS
This account does not have permission to comment on Elephant Journal.
Contact support with questions.