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“There’s nothing like a little physical pain to keep your mind off your emotional problems.” ~ Dr John Sarno
How Journaling Saved My Life
Imagine standing on a stage.
The spotlight shines down as you look out into a sea of faces.
A 10-minute speech awaits.
Your hands are sweating.
Knees wobbling.
Stomach churning.
Your body has responded.
To what?
An emotion: fear.
This physical response fades once the fear is gone.
But what if we lived in a house where a parent could erupt at the smallest trigger?
Or a home where only so-called “good” emotions were allowed?
Or a home where we had to care for the needs of the adults?
We learn that expression of “bad” emotions is dangerous.
And, as a result, we become unconsciously afraid of our own feelings. Inside, an emotional reservoir begins to fill. All it takes is one, big, stressful event for that reservoir to overflow and cause a powerful physical reaction.
Repression Turns into Pain.
I grew up in a household where emotions were rarely expressed except for praise when I achieved something or occasional explosions of anger.
From this, I learned three rules:
- Anger = dangerous
- Being good and perfect = being loved
- Expressing emotions = unacceptable
I buried my “negative” emotions—sadness, grief, despair, anger—so deeply that I didn’t even know that they were there.
At 17, I was in a terrifying car crash. Soon after, I began experiencing on and off right shoulder pain.
Two years later, my parents got divorced, flipping my world upside-down.
Emotionally flat.
Physically destroyed.
My life shrunk to the floor of my university bedroom. My shoulders, neck, back, and legs became lightening rods for pain.
This carried on for six years. I was diagnosed with shoulder bursitis, sciatic, and postural issues. I tried everything to get better—physiotherapy, massage, exercise, medication.
Hopelessness.
Despair.
There was no light at the end of the tunnel.
I felt darkness closing in after trying and failing to heal so many times.
In desperation I stumbled upon a book: The Mindbody Prescription by Dr John Sarno. It describes the connection between repressed emotions and chronic pain.
Click.
A light bulb moment.
To avoid feeling the grief and anger from the divorce, my brain had found the best distraction: pain.
And d*mn it was effective.
But once I saw the disguise, it couldn’t fool me again.
How Journaling Helps Chronic Symptoms.
That was the beginning of my healing.
I started a practice of expressive journaling.
At first it felt awkward and pointless, but slowly my emotions spilled out onto the page. And there was lasting relief from my pain.
Three years later, I’m fully recovered. Journaling was one of the foundations of the road to freedom.
Sounds a bit far fetched?
I get it. I would have said the same thing before I tried it.
But here is why it works:
Pain is a protector.
Our brain uses pain to warn us of threats whether they are physical or emotional.
Many people with chronic pain don’t have injuries that fully explain their symptoms. And everyone with a chronic condition has fear, shame, and despair that comes from living with unexplained pain.
Journaling is a way to express our emotions safely so the brain no longer interprets them as a threat.
Once that happens, pain loses its job as a distraction.
We develop an understanding of our deeper needs and live more truly in accordance with them.
We stop filling our emotional reservoirs and even begin emptying it.
The 4-step Journal Technique.
Here’s how to get started:
Step 1. Make Three Lists
>> Present stressors
>> Past stressors
>> Personality traits that contribute to inner pressure (e.g. perfectionism, goodism, people pleasing)
Top tip: you don’t need to list everything at once—they can be added to over time.
Step 2. Create a Safe Space
>> Find a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed
>> Take a few deep breaths, sighing on the exhale to release tension
>> Choose your medium—a laptop, journal, or loose paper—whatever feels right
Top tip: Use the same space each time. It helps build the habit and for your nervous system to feel safe.
Step 3. Free Write Without Censoring
>> Choose one item from your list
>> Set a 20-minute timer
>> Write whatever comes up—uncensored and unedited
>> If you feel an emotion or bodily sensation, pause, close your eyes and let that guide your words
>> Say it all even if it sounds “bad” or is raw: “Sometimes I hate my partner!” or “I just wanted to be loved.”
Top tip: The timer helps you stay focused and the most powerful breakthroughs often happen in the last few minutes. Stay with it.
Step 4. Rip It Up + Practice Compassion
>> When you’re finished, rip up the pages
>> Then sit quietly, take a couple of breaths, and notice how your body feels.
>> Spend five minutes in self-compassion: repeat a mantra “I am safe and all my emotions are welcome,” or visualise golden light filling your body head to toe.
Top Tip: Destroying your writing builds allows you to write freely. No one will ever see it but you.
The Recovery Process is not Linear.
Healing is not a straight upwards line on a graph.
It looks more like waves.
There are highs and lows but the trend is undeniably upwards.
Sometimes we feel great.
Sometimes we feel terrible.
Sometimes we feel confident.
Sometimes we feel doubtful.
This is an expected part of the process.
This practice brings emotions closer to the surface, many for the first time, and our nervous system might panic.
We can feel more anxious and symptoms can worsen before they improve.
This is normal.
Our brains love familiarity and are used feeling pain rather than emotions.
As Nicole Sachs says:
“Chronic pain is unsafest way to feel safe.”
We may want to quit. Resistance is natural as our brains want to return to the familiar.
So what helps?
>> Patience—this takes time
>> Perseverance—repetition builds new pathways
>> Kindness—being gentle with ourselves creates safety for our nervous systems
You’re not broken. Your pain is real but it might be trying to protect you.
Journaling gave me a way to feel what I was avoiding. It helped me heal.
I hope it can do the same for you.
~
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