Thursday, 22 October 2020

CoDA Weekly Reading

 

Good morning,

I've been reading weekly readings and thinking about how codependency has run rampant in my life, and what I have done to heal.

I was adopted by loving parents and my family, shortly after my birth. My mom grew up in a family that had abuse and dysfunction, so she had a difficult time raising me and helping me develop my emotional self. My dad grew up in a Polish Canadian immigrant family - he became an RCMP member and devoted 50 years to his profession. I revered my dad - he protected me when abuse came to our home.

I have control issues and fear of abandonment. My solution for these is to create healthy boundaries with people who have hurt me, and with people to prevent them from hurting me. I've also sought help from professional counselors to heal my childhood wounds. Processing hurts helps me evolve and become stronger and safer - for me, all the time.

My mom has high blood pressure at 84. She often responds to situations and people with resentment and hurt. I can't fix that but I do give her feedback when she crosses the line with me. I try to accept realities with grace and compassion. Sometimes the people in our lives are incapable of being what we need them to be. I can be what I need to be - for myself, my children, my husband.

Thank you for listening - please feel free to share my comments.

Rhonda Thiemann - 9/2/20

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