I know that many people have experienced a cheating narcissistic partner, just as I have.
Or maybe you are one of those people who is wondering right now if this is actually the case in your relationship.
Please understand that these following 5 signs are often consistent with cheating. I know it is very usual to want to try to get absolute proof, which you may not have whilst you are in the relationship.
Maybe you will get it afterwards, maybe you won’t. You might never really know, or could be eventually shellshocked regarding what this person was really up to.
Either way, your REAL reason to leave and move on, needs to be that this person is not someone who you can have a healthy and happy relationship with, because kindness, honestly, unity and teamwork are not possible.
Having said all of this, today I will help you understand that the following are often indicators that a person is cheating or has the ability to cheat.
#1 Lacking Integrity And Care For Others
Is this a person who is in it for themselves?
People who are monogamous are considerate people. They are loyal and care about their treatment of others.
Narcissists lack this view. They are the person who makes selfish choices – they take what is on offer, and don’t put themselves out for other people genuinely for the sake of caring and giving. They give with strings attached.
Is this person manipulative, and do they operate in a way that can be sneaky or immoral? Do they like to broker deals in their own favour even if it hurts other people?
Personally, I believe that this is a person with a lack of compassion, conscience and integrity.
Who is to say that if attention and sex (which are ego food) was up for offer, that they wouldn’t take the bait?
#2 Suspicious And Accusatory Towards You
Narcissists think that other people think and act like they do.
Abusers project their misdemeanours on to you and then challenge and accuse you of doing it. They may even smear you to others with all sorts of “false evidence” that you are the one cheating on them. Even though this isn’t always the case – with cheaters, it often is.
If you have a partner who is pathologically jealous and convinced that you are cheating, it absolutely means that he or she is dangerously insecure, controlling and abusive, and it also means that there is a very good chance that he or she is cheating on you.
Getting back to the point of this person being empty and insecure on the inside, please understand that is often the exact profile of a cheater.
They feel so defective and broken on the inside that they crave sexual attention, and even cheap and dirty pursuits that many people can be shocked to discover later.
#3 Displays Sex Addiction
Does this person have a history of sexual infidelity, without guilt? Did this person feel entitled to play up in their past relationships?
Sex addicts usually objectify their partners, and/or other people.
Is this person constantly thinking and talking about sex?
Are they into porn?
Are they trying to increase their sexual high with kinky endeavours that they wish you to partake in?
When you have sex with this person do you feel violated, objectified and dehumanised, or even just terribly empty?
If this is the case, you could be in relationship with a sex addict, which means that he or she will be prone to cheat to fulfil that addiction.
#4 Triangulates You With Someone Else
This one can be trickier to decipher.
I can’t tell you how many times I have heard the story of someone’s narcissistic partner having a strange relationship with an ex, or even knowing someone that they profess to dislike but often talk about.
Perhaps they keep this person away from you. Or say things that make you not like this person. Maybe you have sympathy with the narcissist because of what had happened to them in the past with this person – whom they have smeared.
You may feel like something “is not right” and maybe you ask about “what is really going on” and the narcissist tells you that you are imagining things.
Or maybe you just brush away that strange feeling because you want to be a decent person who trusts your partner.
Then, the bombshell falls and you find out they have been having an intimate relationship with this person – whilst telling them bad things about you.
This has happened to me personally, as well as many other people in this community.
I know what a shock it is!
#5 Displays Unfaithful Behaviour
Some narcissists are very overt.
They will eye off people in front of you! Sneakily or obviously.
They may tell you of their sexual exploits with others and even discuss sex in ways that make you feel unattractive or inadequate.
Perhaps this person has brazenly flirted or hit on people right under your nose.
This type of narcissist will spin things when you confront them about this terrible behaviour – telling you that flirting is normal and that you are insecure and paranoid and controlling.
Of course, you would be paranoid with a person like this – and you may be driving yourself crazy by checking up on him or her constantly, and feeling like you are always obsessing about where they are and what they are doing.
If you need to become a private investigator in a relationship, things are NOT good!
Taking Your Power Back
Again, I really want to emphasise this: if you are in a toxic relationship, rather than waiting for the absolute proof of cheating to turn up, I want you to empower yourself by absorbing these truths.
In relation to someone lacking integrity and care for others – a relationship like this means that your rights, values and “self” will constantly be invalidated.
With being suspicious and accusatory towards you – this is abusive and will cause you great distress and pain. A pathologically jealous person can NOT be appeased.
Being with someone who displays sex addiction – this is a person who is not going to be interested in you as a ‘person’. If someone is not connected to your feelings or soul, this is a very shallow and deeply unsatisfying relationship.
Regarding triangulating you with someone else – if you feel like something is not right, I fully endorse that you investigate and find out the truth, rather than accept the narcissist’s word for it.
If someone is genuine, they will support your pursuit of the truth, not talk you out of it. If they do, or deny you access to discover the truth, then you have your answer.
If in a relationship with someone who displays unfaithful behaviour – this is unacceptable.
I really want you to know that you should not be in a relationship with someone who has no care at all for your feelings, regarding their conduct.
I know, so many of us have stayed connected to someone ALL the way through to discovering their infidelities, or even continuing relationships after we discovered it!
But really, the truth is, we need to work on ourselves enough to not continue ANY relationship with narcissistic people who just don’t have the resources for REAL love.
Suffering someone cheating on you is one of the most painful traumas you could ever experience … absolutely.
If you are suffering any of the above, or still have the trauma from a toxic relationship, I know how much my NARP program will help you release and heal this trauma so you will be able to let go, move on and generate a much healthier relationship in your future.
I am looking forward to hearing your thoughts on these 5 points.
Have they happened to you?
Do you feel like this may be happening now?
Were your discoveries shocking?
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