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Spring is here and my journey is taking more shape than ever.
My soul is ready for a deep cleansing, or spring cleaning of habits that aren’t serving me. Over the last few months, I have been in tune with my higher self to become aware of what has been sending me toward suffering and what has sent me toward happiness. I am ready to focus on the latter.
One of my biggest struggles as an entrepreneur and a social media influencer/marketer has been time on my devices. This has translated into way too much time spent scrolling needlessly through irrelevant and emotionally charged posts on Facebook, Instagram, and even reels on YouTube. My brain is unlearning these habits that have been deeply engrained within me for the past decade.
The social media habit has turned into an addiction: When is my post live? How many likes is it getting? Who is viewing it? Is that one person going to watch my story? All of this attention from my mind and soul repeatedly going to these questions is leading me directly into pain and suffering in the form of anxiety—immediately feeding my ego and either giving me or robbing me of instant gratification, dopamine hits, and good vibes from outside.
Last week I coached myself and have asserted new boundaries and come up with some great affirmations in the process.
1. I am making choices on social media that lead me to happiness.
This would mean refraining from checking views and likes. The reason I’m choosing to do this is because I only see myself either getting some instant gratification or getting let down in some way. Excluding this activity from my day will lead me toward happiness, not suffering.
Turning all notifications off. Okay, this one is hard for someone like me with the different pages and businesses I run. However, I have found a balance. I’ve left my small business message notifications on and turned all social media notifications off completely. I’ve set times throughout the day that I can check my inboxes within my separate accounts to manage mail, direct messages, and stay on top of the important things like customers and followers. I don’t need to see, hear, or think about likes, follows, views, or anything like that, though; it only brings me anxiety. So I’m creating certain times to utilize social media intentionally and purposefully.
Replacing those old habits with new and constructive habits. Instead of checking my notifications, I’ll journal, read a blog, read a book, do a mindfulness exercise, repeat my affirmations, go for a walk, or just sit in silence and reflect where my need for that habit is coming from and reassure myself that I’m forming new habits that will lead me to happiness and away from suffering.
2. I am choosing constructive activities with my downtime.
Instead of quickly picking up my phone or running to the couch to watch a movie, I will find something deeper and more meaningful to fill my time with. I have found that my downtime should be full of things that bring me peace, joy, fulfillment, and knowledge. Sometimes a docuseries or a good show may bring me some of that; however, turning to it out of habit is something I must change. Idleness comes from habits consumed by screen time and perpetuates my need to turn to my phone once again and check those notifications.
Once again, turning this time into something that leads to overall mind, body, and soul happiness is a path I’m seeking.
3. I am focusing my energy on the here and now.
Being present is a huge part of my journey, so getting lost in social media or technology in general is a sure way to avoid the present moment. When I think about it, being on social media and scrolling mindlessly through other people’s experiences is taking me as far away from where I’m at as possible. I’m removing myself from the here and now. Shifting all my energy into something outside of myself and sending it all into a tiny, little box in my hand.
What does it give me in return? Anxiety, fear, insecurity, irrelevant gratification, pain, and suffering. This manifests through wanting to be somewhere else, wanting something someone else has, doing things I’m not doing, and so on. I will admit that utilizing social media or the internet for growth and education is perfectly acceptable for me to do as long as I set out to do that in the moment. I can’t lose myself seeking other moments or escape from the moment I’m in. I must remain present.
4. I am choosing to utilize technology responsibly.
This ties into everything I’ve written about above. Choosing to use all my screen time intently and responsibly for myself can give me time to enjoy everything else around me, stay in the present moment, and not fall into habitual stagnancy. Because it’s so easy for me to pick up the phone or turn on a show, this makes it so easy to fall into habits that lead me away from happiness.
Choosing to utilize technology during certain times of the day and night will allow me to create more time for activities that lead me to creative and constructive behaviors. Getting to be more aware of this is important to me right now, especially modeling this behavior for my children and even family members will hopefully create stronger bonds in family time with less separation in presence with each other.
5. I embrace the uncertainty of my day without technology.
This is key for me to be able to break the habits. I must be okay without the comfort of devices during all my other activities, for I have created patterns surrounding my screen time that isn’t conducive to being present or happy. The last few months have really shown me the distress and anxiety created from constantly seeking validation and instant gratification from outside myself—once again, putting me into a downward spiral of pain and suffering.
Once I saw these patterns emerging, I sat with them and watched where they were coming from. I could actually witness these emotions coming on strongly during device usage or even device withdrawals, which has led me to my new affirmations and strong urgency to change my habits.
Reforming all of my habits and having restraint will help guide me into new practices and routines. Healthy routines, practices, and habits that lead to happiness.
When I struggle and pick up my phone, tablet, or the TV remote, I ask myself a few different questions: is this what you really want? Is this what your soul wants? What are you escaping from right now? Is there something else you should be doing? Are there other things you’d rather be doing?
This isn’t an easy path when dealing with habits or addictive behaviors, but I’m ready for the challenge.
~
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