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We woke up at 7 a.m. yesterday.
My two-year-old son peeked out the window and asked, “Mama, what’s this?”
I looked outside and saw a rapidly spreading smoke covering the sky. We live on the premises of my husband’s business, so I woke him up and told him to check the CCTV footage.
When he turned on the TV, I heard him say the video surveillance system was not accessible. A few minutes later, we found out that a major fire had broken out at the restaurant and the beach bar.
When we got there, all we could see were flames. We felt everything and nothing. Our hearts shattered into a million pieces. All our hard work was wasted, but we were thankful that no one was hurt.
I held my toddler in one arm and wiped my tears in the other as I watched the fire take everything we had worked so hard to achieve. I was devastated; my son was excited to see the fire engine and firefighters. He munched on his banana, happily; I was glad he didn’t understand what had happened.
The morning before the fire, we had breakfast at the beach bar. My son brought with him his new knife set to cut the cucumbers. He pretended to drink coffee while I had mine peacefully. I took a picture to remember; I smiled; I was happy.
The morning after the fire, as I walked on the debris, I secretly wanted to find one single thing that was intact—a chair, a plate, a mug…anything. But fires leave nothing behind—except for distorted memories and aching hearts. I did find the coffee pot, though. I could still taste yesterday’s coffee in my mouth.
A fire took my husband’s business, but it didn’t take our perseverance. We lost a lot, but we gained each other. We gained the present moment because life has reminded us in the ugliest way that nothing lasts. It has reminded us that impermanence is right around the corner, creeping up on us, telling us to keep our guard up.
I cried. I grieved. Now I’m accepting. Challenges have a funny way of taming us. They force us to accept reality, no matter how hard it is. They force us to get back up, no matter how hopeless we are. They force us to enjoy now—because now might not come again tomorrow.
We are slowly replacing our pain with hope and sadness with faith. Loss is nothing but a catalyst for growth. Endings are just beginnings in disguise, and that’s what suddenly makes everything (slightly) better.
~
author: Elyane Youssef
Image: Author's own
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