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Jealousy is one of the toughest
feelings we come up against in our lives. There is not much worse than
this aching sense that somehow life has been unfair to us, while amply
rewarding someone else. It’s even worse if that someone else is present
in our daily lives, making it difficult for us to get the space we need
to feel and heal our pain. We may be jealous of a sibling, a dear friend,
or even famous personalities. We may even face the challenge of feeling
jealous of our spouse, our child, or one of our parents. Whatever the
case, we can normalize our experience by understanding that, as painful
as it is, jealousy is a common human feeling.
Nevertheless, it is important that we
not revel in our jealousy for too long, feeding it with inner talk or
gossip with others. If we do, we run the risk of losing ourselves to its
negative power. This complex emotion has something good to offer us — information
about our own heart’s desire. When we envy certain people, we want what
they have, and if we are to be conscious, we must acknowledge that. In
this way, we discover what we want for ourselves, which is the first step
to getting it. It may be a certain kind of relationship or a career.
Whatever it is, it is possible that we could create it for ourselves in
our own lives if we are able to honor our own desires.
Of course, there are times when we
cannot heal our jealousy in this way, and then the lesson may be about
acceptance and the understanding that our path is different from the
paths of those around us. It may be hard to see now, but perhaps, it will
eventually be clear why our life has taken its particular path. In the
end, the best cure for jealousy is the recognition that the life we have
is full of its own meaning and beauty, utterly unique to us — a gift that
could never be found in the life of another.
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