Tuesday, 17 February 2026

Finding Belonging as a Neurodivergent Individual.

 


 

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Being neurodivergent comes with its own trials and tribulations.

To truly feel that sense of belonging is something we chase after, day in and day out. I always thought that if I acted “normal,” and hid my so-called “flaws,” then I would be accepted and feel less different.

But the thing is, I want to be accepted and recognized for being my true, authentic self.

I’ve learned that belonging doesn’t come from making yourself shrink or being easier to understand. It comes from being seen for who you really are, quirks and all. I want to be accepted because of my differences, not in spite of them.

When you’re neurodivergent, you spend so much time trying to decipher the world.

I study people’s reactions, mirror their tone, and their energy.

Growing up, I didn’t understand why I felt so different. I just assumed that I was a very shy person who had some difficulties with communication and connecting with others. I definitely made friends, but not by exposing who I really was on the inside. My entire goal was just to blend in and not be noticed for my “oddities.” But that made me feel so incredibly lonely and isolated that I lost my sense of self. I felt like each time I masked, I’d lose a little piece of myself.

Belonging feels exhausting after essentially holding your breath for years. It’s sitting with someone who doesn’t flinch when you need some quiet time, someone who doesn’t judge your pacing and fidgeting, and someone who doesn’t take things personally when you cancel plans because your brain is just too tired for people that day.

The real belonging that lasts, starts with finding yourself. I know that when I stopped trying to keep up with neurotypical expectations and started honoring what actually worked for me, it was liberating.

I’ve realized that the more I accept myself, the more I attract people who do too.

I want to be around people who reach out with understanding, not judgement. People who don’t need me to explain myself about why I am the way that I am. They just know. With people like that, I don’t feel broken. I feel whole.

Belonging, I’ve learned, doesn’t happen when the world finally makes space for you.

It happens when you stop trying to squeeze yourself into spaces that were never meant to hold you.

“The truth is: Belonging starts with self-acceptance. Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance, because believing that you’re enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic, vulnerable and imperfect.” ~ Brene Brown


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