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There are certain patterns I’ve watched in myself for years—reactions, beliefs, thoughts, and the feelings that arise in certain kinds of situations.
I’ve noticed tendencies of my mind, ways my mind will tend to react.
And over time, through observation, I’ve felt some shifts, some change, a greater ability to hold it all from a distance, to not get entirely sucked into it, or at least, with some things, for now, not as often.
This is part of the process of change, this kind of change.
It can be slow, incremental; it can feel like not much is happening, or at least not as quickly as we might like.
But if we’re aware, if we’re mindful, if we’re paying attention, we can notice the small changes, the slightest of shifts.
Sometimes change within us can happen immediately.
We have an insight, an understanding, and suddenly things are different; we move differently.
There was before and then there is now.
And sometimes change takes time.
It can take time.
It can be slow.
The changes might be slight, or subtle, but if we’re aware, we can see that they’re happening.
We may notice a slight pause or shift in how we’re experiencing something, maybe one moment where we don’t react in the way that we used to. Or maybe we have a deeper awareness or insight into the roots of our reactions, what they stem from and what they mean.
Or maybe we find we’re able to remain more deeply centered even if those reactions continue to arise; maybe we don’t give ourselves as fully into them. Or maybe we can hold it all more lightly, with less judgment or attachment or identification.
We can notice these little movements, these shifts.
We can make a conscious intention to be present with our experiences, to be mindful, to observe what’s happening within us.
We can stay committed to this path, to the journey.
And we can understand it’s a journey.
And each movement along this path is progress; it’s an opening.
Working through some of our reactions, through our habituated patterns, can be a process. It can be a slow unfurling. It may be less of the immediate thing we want to see happening and more of the slightest of baby steps in the direction of where we want to be going.
It’s important to be present through the journey, to be aware of the little changes that are happening in the moment, because each small shift is freedom.
Here are two helpful things to keep in mind:
1. Understand it can take time.
Remind yourself that it can take time. Practice being present, practice watching and observing yourself—your thoughts, your reactions, the tendencies of your mind. Embrace the journey of it, being present with it. If you feel frustrated by a pattern that’s still happening or by some way you keep reacting, notice that too. Watch that too. Observe the pattern and your reaction to it. Let all of it be a part of the process. Let yourself understand that change can take time, and it can’t be forced.
2. Celebrate each slight shift.
Take note of each shift, each insight, any element of expanded awareness or understanding. Notice the moment when you didn’t react in the way that you used to, or at least not with as much energy. Maybe you have a deeper insight into what the reaction means or where it comes from.
Practice observing what’s happening, and let yourself be with the process of change—each small shift, each opening, each baby step along the path is progress. It’s freedom.
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author: Lisa Erickson
Image: Brian Jr Asare/Pexels
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