I've noticed that when I experience something in my life that sets me back a little, one of the first things I do is isolate from others. I start not returning phone calls or in some cases just not answering the phone. I cancel dinners, coffees, trips because I just don't feel like being around people. Some of that is good; it shows me that I'm learning to listen to myself and honor my needs. But with anything in recovery, there has to be a balance.
After I've had my brief time of collecting myself and grieving in some cases or getting back in balance, I have to ignore the feelings that would continue that isolation. This week I made myself go on a dinner date with a friend. It was a cold, rainy night and it was the last thing I wanted to do. I wanted to stay home and hibernate. I went anyway and after a few minutes of chatting, I could feel my spirits lifting. By the time we said goodbye, I felt light and happy - ready to join the world again.
So with me it is not a matter of thinking myself into acting differently; but acting my way into thinking differently.
Camilla P. (2005)
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