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New Year’s resolutions are stressful.
They’re based on fleeting compulsions that might lead to disappointment.
I prefer intentions; they’re less rigid and more authentic. They focus on the “how” without immense pressure for change.
At the beginning of every year, I like to set intentions. I approach them from a growth perspective and prioritize them without putting pressure on myself.
I usually set career, health, or spiritual intentions. I think the New Year offers a clean slate, which makes us more focused on things that require “fresh starts,” like our jobs, diets, and inner child work.
However, our incessant drive for self-improvement and success makes us forget about the things that also need our attention but tend to stay in the back of our minds because, well, they seem fine.
Are they really fine, though?
I’m talking about our romantic relationships. They look fine on the outside, but the truth is they need continuous effort and work. In fact, they should top the rest of our intentions.
Relationships don’t work on autopilot. Without intentional intervention, they might fail and die a slow, ugly death.
This year, we should move beyond (unpredictable and transitory) emotions and walk toward effort, presence, and connection. To strengthen our relationships, we must get behind the wheel and take charge of our emotional health.
The best way to do this is to take advantage of the fresh start the New Year offers. It’s our chance to examine what went well in our relationship and what didn’t and choose key intentions to avoid drifting apart. We can do it alone or fine-tune them with our partner and keep our intentions saved somewhere safe.
Your intentions might be different than mine, but I do hope that my list inspires you to create yours. Remember, intentions are deeply personal and should benefit your own relationship to keep the connection alive. You can also revisit them anytime and assess their functionality depending on how you and your partner may feel.
To start, ask yourself:
How do I want my relationship to feel?
Then, you can go deeper and think about all the ways that can help you establish and nourish the relationship you dream about.
Here are my own relationship intentions for 2026:
1. Find gratitude in the present moment. Even when I have a bad day, I need to remember that my own attitude shapes my relationship. So choosing a mindset of gratitude in the midst of chaos helps keep my relationship anchored.
2. Prioritize self-care. When I replenish my own emotional reserves, I can show up in better ways for my partner without resentment or depletion. Meeting my needs first helps me to meet his own needs as well.
3. Avoid criticism. I want to focus on my feelings and the situation rather than what I think my partner should have done or said. When I notice how I feel about something, I make space for mindful conversations.
4. Embrace the challenges. Relationships aren’t meant to be smooth all the time. There will be difficulties and I’m ready to embrace them, as it’s part of having a healthy, long-term relationship.
5. Maintain and respect personal space. When you become a couple, it’s easy to forget about your individuality. When I maintain my own interests, I create space for my partner to maintain his and celebrate who we are when we’re not physically together.
6. Focus on the journey, not the details. Daily circumstances are often messy and unpredictable. I don’t want to focus on them; I want to focus on what brings us together at the end of every day: our values and love.
~
author: Elyane Youssef
Image: Polina Tankilevitch/Pexels
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