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Why the Simple Memories Matter More than the Milestones
Not too long ago, my dear friend and former co-worker came to town for a visit.
We last had lunch together during the early summer of this year. We love catching up having random conversations over lunch at our favorite spot in town.
As my friend and I sat at our cute table, we quickly got busy with regular small talk, like always when we meet for lunch. We discussed upcoming Thanksgiving plans and the latest hobbies we’ve picked up—nothing unusual until the conversation took a more profound turn. But then, something shifted.
As we chatted, reminiscing about the good and bad days we had working together on our elementary school campus, the easy flow of conversation turned deeper—in a good and exciting way, I should say. My friend paused and said, “I’ve been feeling nostalgic lately.” Then she looked at me thoughtfully and asked, “If you could go back for just one day, which moment from the past would you relive?”
The question hung in the air, momentarily simple yet profound and unexpected.
For a second, I smiled, intrigued momentarily by the thought and ready to take a journey down memory lane—a trip I hadn’t expected to take because I don’t typically dwell on the past. I tend to live in the present, focusing on where I’m headed next. But for a moment, something about that question made me pause and reflect. Almost immediately, memories of my carefree days when I was a young teenager vacationing with my family on the southern coastline of Italy came rushing back.
At that moment, though we were sitting in that loud room having lunch, my memories took me back to that beautiful place where the warm and gentle touch of the sun from the Mediterranean coast of southern Italy was incredible. The endless stretches of sandy beaches—a time of utter simplicity. At that time, there were no deadlines, no responsibilities weighing me down.
During those long days of our hot summer, we laughed, swam, and savored every meal together, often sitting around the table for hours as the sun dipped behind the horizon. At dinner, I can still remember the sound of waves crashing in the distance from our terrace.
Thinking back, those stress-free summers felt like magic. I often wondered how fun it would be if I could relive any moments, such as those vacations. The good times we shared as a family, carefree and joyful, were things I hadn’t truly appreciated until much later.
But other moments shaped me in ways I hadn’t fully realized then. One of them was my college graduation. I remember the excitement and pride I felt, along with the nerves. I was terrified of stepping onto that stage, afraid I might trip in front of everyone. I wore flats that day instead of the heels I had planned to calm my anxiety. I didn’t want to risk it. And when the time came, as I walked across the stage to accept my diploma, my heart raced, but my steps were steady.
As we were having fun looking back at the happy days of the past, we also realized something important: to remember that life’s most precious moments aren’t always the big milestones. Often, it’s the simple, fleeting moments we share with the people we love. The walks home from school in Naples, the laughter of family vacations, the quiet moments of connection—they’re the ones that, in hindsight, become the most meaningful.
Nostalgic but happy, we finished our lunch and parted ways, and I reflected on our conversation. While it’s lovely to revisit the past, there’s something equally important about being present in the now. After all, the moments that we are living today such as lunch with a friend, laughter over a shared memory, could be the ones we long to revisit tomorrow.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that life moves quickly. Being more mindful of these everyday moments allows us to discover the beauty and meaning we often yearn for.
I have realized as I look back at my life that it’s not the significant milestones or major events that truly stick with me, but the small, everyday moments that might seem ordinary at the time, but are filled with meaning when we reflect on them. It may be a family vacation on a sunny beach. Or how I felt with my nervous excitement of walking across the stage at my graduation. It may be engaging in deep conversations with a friend or experiencing meaningful moments that shape us and bring us joy.
These moments remind me that the natural beauty in life comes from the simple things—laughter, love, and time spent with the people who matter most.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to relive joyful moments, but it’s equally important to focus on the present. The seemingly insignificant things we experience today—laughter over lunch, a walk with a friend—could be the memories we treasure most tomorrow.
These are the moments that truly matter.
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